Sunday, May 12, 2013

Immodest Ladies & Stumbling Gents, Finale

The curious argument that women are responsible for the sins of men has been around from time immemorial. But if God didn't let Adam get away with blaming Eve, if Israel lost the Kingdom of God when they stumbled over the Rock of Offense (Jesus) and rejected salvation by grace, why do we think men should get away with blaming women for their inability to control their own flesh?

The story about Amnon and Tamar is a sobering reminder that even the most virtuous of women can become the target of uncontrolled lust.

In the course of time, Amnon son of David fell in love with Tamar, the beautiful sister of Absalom son of David. Amnon became frustrated to the point of illness on account of his sister Tamar, for she was a virgin, and it seemed impossible for him to do anything to her. Now Amnon had a friend named Jonadab son of Shimeah, David's brother. Jonadab was a very shrewd man. He asked Amnon, "Why do you, the king's son, look so haggard morning after morning? Won't you tell me?"  Amnon said to him, "I'm in love with Tamar, my brother Absalom's sister." "Go to bed and pretend to be ill," Jonadab said. "When your father comes to see you, say to him, 'I would like my sister Tamar to come and give me something to eat. Let her prepare the food in my sight so I may watch her and then eat it from her hand.'" So Amnon lay down and pretended to be ill. When the king came to see him, Amnon said to him, "I would like my sister Tamar to come and make some special bread in my sight, so I may eat from her hand." David sent word to Tamar at the palace: "Go to the house of your brother Amnon and prepare some food for him." So Tamar went to the house of her brother Amnon, who was lying down. She took some dough, kneaded it, made the bread in his sight and baked it. Then she took the pan and served him the bread, but he refused to eat. "Send everyone out of here," Amnon said. So everyone left him. Then Amnon said to Tamar, "Bring the food here into my bedroom so I may eat from your hand." And Tamar took the bread she had prepared and brought it to her brother Amnon in his bedroom. But when she took it to him to eat, he grabbed her and said, "Come to bed with me, my sister." "Don't, my brother!" she said to him. "Don't force me. Such a thing should not be done in Israel! Don't do this wicked thing. What about me? Where could I get rid of my disgrace? And what about you? You would be like one of the wicked fools in Israel. Please speak to the king; he will not keep me from being married to you." But he refused to listen to her, and since he was stronger than she, he raped her (1 Sam 13:1-14 NIV).

The key to the question why men use violence against women isn't found in clothing; it is found in the man's greater physical strength. If the woman was equally strong, the man would have to at least recognize her as an equal, although he might still try to overpower her. The woman's inferior physical strength gives the man the advantage he so often uses for his own selfish purposes. But because fallen humans do not like to accept responsibility for the evil they've done, we blame the victim. And hence we hear the endless repertoire about how immodestly dressed women cause men to stumble. If it was really true, the beach would pose the greatest danger to women. That, however, is not the case. Women are in danger everywhere they go, just because they are women.

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